Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Bend 'em, don't Break 'em

One of the things I have struggled to learn is how to bend the rules here in India. If there is a sidewalk, I walk along the sidewalk. I don't cut the corner. I am a rules follower. I look for rules. I give rules. I enforce rules even if it is not my duty to do so. But here the rules are stated freely, but rarely ever followed strictly. There is a sign in our complex that reads, "Don't walk on the grass." Firstly, what in the world? Why put in grass if you can't walk on it? No one follows this rule. We all walk on the grass. So why even go through the trouble of putting this sign up? It all seems a bit like a game to me.

Yesterday, I got stopped by the cops. I knew it would happen sometime, but still I was unprepared for it. The girls and I were driving to the library and just before our destination there stood 5 or 6 cops. They were waving folks over left and right. I was hoping to slip on by, but no such luck.
He asked for my papers and then walked away. Papers? I didn't even know we had papers. I looked in the glove box and surprise there were papers with some strange man's picture printed on the page. The previous owner? I checked and our insurance is good until June 2012. Woo Hoo! I joined the crowd around the officer. There were probably 10 of us. I showed him my papers and he asked for my license. I went back to get it. When we first arrived a cousin checked with the RTO, the Indian equivalent of the U.S. DMV. Our cousin reported it was ok to drive on a U.S. license. I doubted it but I didn't question him. Now it was show time. I presented my license and the officer said no that he needed an international license.
What to do? What to do? Star and Flip are in the car. Marvel is out of town. I have about 3 rupees left on my prepaid calling plan, so I couldn't actually contact anyone else. Should I grovel like the 2 whiney Iranian girls who had recently joined the group?
Instead I was firm, confident and lied straight through my teeth.
I looked the officer straight in the eye, "My U.S. license is good for a year. I called and they told me."
He shook his head and replied, "Pay 400 rupees fine."
"No,"I repeated. "My license is good. I called and checked."
The whole time my heart is beating like a rocket ship that is about to take off through my mouth. The officer just shook his head and looked back towards the others who were handing him money for their fines. Some of this money went straight into his pocket. Some of this money was given a receipt in exchange. I had no idea if we were playing above the law or below. And those Iranian girls were really whining. I wanted to pay their fine to just to get them out of there.
I walked back to my car, got out my wallet, tried to explain to worried Star and bouncing off the walls Flip what was going on. My rule abiding, Star, suggested I just pay it. I had it. Just pay it. I almost did, but I decided to give it one more go.
I walked back up to the dwindling group, plus the 2 Queens of Whine, looked him straight in the eye and said, "I think you should call someone. I know I can drive with my license. You and I have a misunderstanding."
Really who know why he did it. I'd like to think it was my calm and confident manner. It could have been he collected his quota for the day. He might have just wanted us all to SHUT UP and walk away. But, regardless, he waved me off.
Rules successfully bent.

On Tuesdays, our pool and club house is closed. I don't know why for certain. I imagine the manager needs a holiday from all of us. That is fine. That makes sense. But then, shouldn't they use Tuesday as a day to clean the clubhouse and the pools? I walked down to the pool and found a guy vacuuming the pool. "
Mam," he said as he saw me approach, "the pool is closed for cleaning."
"I will just swim on this side, " I replied and gestured to the other side of the pool.
Now, I know this won't work. If you are vacuuming the pool you want the water as calm as possible so all the matter will sink to the bottom.
"No, mam. You can come back at 1," the cleaner replied.
"Why don't you clean on Tuesday? The pool is closed then. No one swims on Tuesdays, " I said in an effort to steer the conversation.
He just bobbled his head very ambiguously and went back to his cleaning.
This is when Sowmya enters. Think of most of the Disney movies you have seen. There is a beautiful woman with long, dark flowing hair high on a balcony. 4th floor, actually. But now, flip it. I am not there to rescue this lady, she is there to rescue me. "Do you need any help?" she asks. And then she takes over. Very patiently, very persistently, and very successfully she talks this cleaner into letting me swim on the other side while he cleans.
Rules successfully bent.

I did come home and google the fines one should pay if caught driving without a license here in India. 300 rupees. And I found out definitely I am not allowed to drive on a U.S. license. I looked into getting an India license, as I am not sure I can get an international license now that I am already international. This is the rules part of me trying to comply and trying to make amends with the Indian rules bending side.

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