Tuesday, June 26, 2012

When the Grandparents Came

This post is long overdue.  I can hardly believe it has been a month since we said Good bye to Avva.  We had a lovely month of grandparents- Taata, Avva and Hop.  And unfortunately since Avva was the last to leave she got the full brunt of the emotion.  I wasn't sure how we were going to pry Star off of Avva, she was crying so hard.  The girls loved having all their adoring grandparents here and the homesickness when they left was difficult to manage.  At one point I found Star completely wrapped up in one of Avva's sarees she had left here.  We compromised by letting her snip a corner and letting her make a hankie.

Even though it was hard to say good-bye we would not have traded those visits for anything.  One of my favorite memories was the 70th Birthday pooja we had for Marvel's father before I left for the States. So many family members came to wish him well and only one person put me on the spot by asking, "Do you know who I am?" This question used to throw me and I would get embarrassed but this time I simply replied, "No, please tell me who you are." Ha! Take that! Hope you feel embarrassed now! But also the truth is, I know so many more people now, so that even if I can not recall their name I at least know how they are related and I can ask a pertinent question or two.

I am mostly familiar with Avva's side of the family as we spend most of our time in Mysore and Bangalore.  So this day was special because many of the guests were from Taata's side.  And as we held it in Bangalore many of my in laws' old friends came.  Old friends who lived with them in the US in the early years and have moved back to India.  It was simply lovely to see the smiles on Taata and Avva's faces.

The girls really got into the celebration as well, both in their own way.  I wish our internet connection was fast enough to show you all the videos Star took on my phone. And Flip just did what she does best, got right in there.


The pooja began before 7 am and went past noon with one break for breakfast.  It was a long morning, but it was a great pooja.  These particular priests were incredibly enthusiastic, actually taking time to enunciate. Not typical in my limited experience.  Most priests mumble only stopping to speak clearly when they need to direct their pooja participants to do some physical act such as throw something or hold something.  And Marvel's mom said she was at first pleased with the head priest's answers when she asked a question.  He was more than happy to explain all she wanted to know and MORE. That was when she realized he might be too enthusiastic and if she wanted to feed folks on time she had to keep her curiosity to a minimum.

Again I wish I could post a video of the pooja because if you have never seen one it is fascinating. It is such a physical worship which I love.  Sometimes it gets crazy such as one point when Marvel and I were holding a strainer like item over his parents' heads.  Inside the strainer was a couple of necessary objects, one of which had to be silver.  The attendees made a line and took turns to dip leaves into holy water and shake the water through the strainer onto their heads, like a blessing.  Yes, I would love to know the backstory of that particular act, so if anyone devout Hindu blog reader out there is willing... As crazy as it looked and as tired as my hand became from holding that strainer over their hands, it filled my heart with joy to see each family or friend come up and wish their blessings on my in laws.

At the end of the pooja the priests passed out rice and flowers to all the attendees.  Even the folks who had wondered outside were beckoned in and the handfuls are shared amongst kids and late comers. We all stood holding the rice and flowers in our hands listening to the last prayers being said, ready to throw the rice and flowers onto the idols. Everyone was crowded together, shoulder to shoulder, listening and waiting.  So it was hot. Add a kid on the hip and it was super hot.  Like I said, it was long morning and I was having trouble keeping my impatience at bay. At this point Marvel leaned over to me and whispered, "I can't count the number of times I remember being a kid holding rice and flowers in my sweaty hand and praying for it all to end so I could throw my flowers, end the pooja and go eat. I am so glad our kids are having this experience."


1 comment:

  1. love this post.
    did i miss what pooja is exactly?
    miss you guys.
    C

    ReplyDelete