When we first moved in, Gayatri was swinging along side a little girl. This little girl, whose name I later learned is Savi, looked at me directly in the eye and announced.
"I have a secret."
"Wow, a secret! Secrets can be fun. Are you going to tell me your secret?"
"Yes. My mom has a baby in her tummy."
On May 10th Savi became a big sister to a baby brother and I was called over by their mom, Sowmya, for a small function to meet this beautiful baby boy. Now I must admit I spent a good 7 years offering excellent lip service to new mothers in my life. The truth was as cute and adorable all those babies were, I honestly wanted nothing to do with them. I had enough small human beings pulling on me, sucking from me, climbing on me, demanding from me, loving on me, drooling on me, hugging on me, and slobbering kisses all over me. I had no desire to hold anyone else's small being until about a year ago, when Gayatri finally let me out of her baby grip and granted me a bit of freedom. So a couple of days ago when I saw my chance I quickly grabbed tiny Samarth ripped off his blanket and admired his sweet little feet. I cooed at him and welcomed him wholeheartedly into this world. And when it came time for the arthi, I made sure I had a front row seat to watch my friend.
I was not the only one who wanted a front row seat. Savi and her friend, Sia, secured front row seats and then spent there rest of the time being scolded by their parents to step back when they got in the way and called to come closer when they drifted too far away. Sia reminds me so much of Shalini a couple of years ago. Whenever I join the group at the play area, Sia is the first to welcome me with a giant, "Hello Auntie!" and a big wave. And Sia never misses a chance to dress up. She is always dressed in the fanciest of Indian clothes or the prettiest of western outfits. So you can be sure Sia did not disappoint this time. She had on a beautiful langa and bangles stacked up her wrists. As I listened to a mother and daughter sing a lullaby about Baby Krisha I noticed Sia watching the singer. She, too, was mesmerized by this beautiful song and she did just what Shalini would have done. She kept her eyes fixed on the singer, opened her mouth, bobbled her head and tried to sing along. Then Sia stood watching as the ladies of the house performed the arthi, blessing the new mom and baby.
There have been many times that I have been questioned by Indians asking why we want to bring our family here to live. These Indians are usually the ones that have been abroad and are quick to point out all the things that are "right" in other countries and all the things that are "wrong" in India. I can't deny there are many things dysfunctional and frustrating about India- remember my re-entry post? But there is so much that is right about India. Things one can't do justice in a simple description. But if I could capture that look in Sia's eye as she watched the women. Or if I could explain the strong beauty in the scene of Sowmya with her hand over her newborn's face as her mother in law sprinkled rice over both of them. Perhaps then, I would not get these questions. India is such a beautiful place- steeped in ritual, love, tradition, and warmth. I am lucky I am able to live in this country and to return year after year. I am able to make friends and have family who include me and my children and welcome us into their homes. This is why we choose to insist to our kids that they are Indian. We try to show them ways to be proud of their heritage. And we try to instill in them a sense of belonging in this country, so they can gently move between the two countries.
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